"Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus" ~ Letting go

In the last several months, I have been embraced with life altering circumstances that captured my mind and time. One of which, was watching my mom's last battle with Alzheimer's disease. She didn't lose the battle... she won! Mom is at rest in heaven. But she's not just in heaven, she is with her savior, Jesus Christ. Her last request she uttered was, "I want to see my Christ." She gracefully left this world leaving us a beautiful picture of her gazing upon Jesus face. There is a hymn I love to sing...

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace."

Although the grief was gripping, one constant became evident -- God's sovereign grace. He was faithful to get me though some of toughest months of my life. The emotions and fears were so much a reality that I would cry out, "Oh God please... please get me though this." My hope was in His faithfulness from the past and from His promises in the Bible. What else did I have? I couldn't rely on my own to get through it. No one could fix it for me. I had to trust, pray, and be faithful to God. It was difficult but necessary.

When there is that moment you think, "I don't know if I can take one more thing," stop and pray. Not very profound, right? Or is it?

Prayer is hope. It's turning your eyes on Jesus. I know that if I didn't stop and pray at every moment something was wrong or emotional, I would have gone into a rage of fear or depression. The minute my prayers were lifted, I had begun to let go to the God who's grace had brought me salvation. I had a hope in the One who knew my inner fears and insecurities -- Hope He could also save me from this. He gave me a peace in the raging storm. Oh, how I wish you could know Jesus in this way. I can't tell you I was always happy but I can say I had a joy in Him. There is a difference between having happiness in your circumstances and joy in the Lord through your circumstances. How? Life is unpredictable... God is constant. You can trust God and He will always be there with you. He knows...

"Looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the sham, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." ~ Hebrews 12:2 (NKJV)

I'm not sure what tomorrow will bring but God does. Pray to Him -- tell Him your pain and fears. Let go and receive the joy in knowing He is in control. It kept me stable and got me though to the other side. You may be in the midst of it right now. Don't just take my word for it, do it for yourself. Turn your eyes upon Jesus now and He will make the trouble dim. Have hope that you will be gazing upon His face in heaven one day just like my mom is doing right now.

"Lord, hear my prayer; let my cry for help come before you. Do not hide your face from me in my day of trouble." ~ Psalm 102:1-2 (HCSB)

I let it go to you, Amen

© Carol Outhous Jones 2014

The Room – Letting go of spiritual battles

There she sits – in a room. There are no windows or doors for escape. A chilling, dark fireplace is opposite her as she sits in the corner; hugging her legs to her chest. Trapped and alone; her feelings are overwhelming. Captured by the fire that is ablaze in the center of the room, swirling in the rug, she tries to look away – if only she could look away and look up. Above her is an open ceiling to a beautiful blue sky. It is a way out but, she just can't see it. She is trapped.

This was a dream I had one night. I woke up and had no clue what this dream meant. All I could do is draw the picture with the rich reds and browns it painted on my mind. A year later I had the dream again. This was when I saw that the ceiling to the room was gone and there was blue sky above. I realized that this was indeed me in the room, and the blue sky was God calling me to see Him in the midst of my problems that overwhelmed me, to the point I felt trapped without escape.

God has changed my life. I often imagine if I had stayed in my feelings of entrapment, where would I be today? I would be lost and probably far away from God – sad and confused. So, how did I get out of that room? Well, I didn't. My problems are still there but, I seek to look at the blue sky above. This is how I don't feel trapped. I have hope in my God. He has promised me eternity in heaven. I don't give up because of that hope.

With this perspective He then can use me for His glory. It's not about me anymore. It's about living for Him not myself. Satan wants us to feel trapped and alone. He makes it his mission to destroy us so we won't be used for God's glory. Sure, I still battle with feelings of entrapment. I have to let go of my problems to God, everyday. He is the one who gives me the strength to not give up.

The way to be ready for Satan's attacks, is to have the armor of God on.

"Finally, be strengthened by the Lord and by His vast strength. Put on the full armor of God so that you can stand against the tactics of the Devil. For our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the world powers of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavens. This is why you must take up the full armor of God, so that you may be able to resist in the evil day, and having prepared everything, to take your stand. Stand, therefore, with truth like a belt around your waist, righteousness like armor on your chest, and your feet sandaled with readiness for the gospel of peace. In every situation take the shield of faith, and with it you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is God’s word."

~ Ephesians 6:10-17 (HCSB)

Are you feeling trapped? If this is where you are, Look Up! Stop to pray for God's help but, this time you need to look up. The more you are consumed by your surroundings the more you cant see the blue sky above. This perspective is about an eternal hope to withstand a spiritual battle. God gives you everything you need to be prepared. Seek Him and let go of your problems to Him. Don't give up!

"Therefore we do not give up. Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day. For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory. So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

~ 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (HCSB)

"Heavenly Father thank you for saving me and giving me hope. I let go of my thoughts of giving up to you. I let go of my problems that easily entrap me. Pease help me to have more faith in the midst of my affliction. Renew my heart to focus on the eternal perspective."

© Carol Outhous Jones 2014

Your The Inspiration – letting go to receive God's love

♥ "Your the meaning in my life. Your the inspiration. You bring feeling to my life. Your the inspiration." ♥ This song, by Chicago, was playing on the radio recently and a flood of memories came back to me from my high school years. I could just picture, like it was yesterday, driving down the road singing this song. It was of course a love song and being a teenager, I associated it with a boy. Oh, to be young and in love.

After I went down memory lane, I thought about who's love inspires me in my life, now. All those I love, of course. Then, a flood of emotions ascended to the forefront of my mind. My relationship with my one an only Savior, Jesus Christ, is the love of my life. So, while driving down the road I began to sing that chorus along with the radio, but this time, as a middle age woman in love with her God. He is the meaning, my inspiration, and the one who brings feeling to my life. Without Him, I would not be really loved.

I know this may sound crazy, but it's true. I have never felt loved more than by my God. He care for me like no other. He gives me hope on days I feel like there is no hope. He provides food and clothing when the money is not there. He feeds my soul with peace and comfort from His Word, the Bible. He listens to my cries and lifts me up. He gives me wisdom when I am lost. He grows my faith when I am weak. He is my friend when I need someone to talk to. He never leaves me. He never lies to me. He is my father when I need to be corrected for my protection. He forgives me for everything! He died on the cross for me. Wow! He inspires me to love as He loves. John 15:12 says, "This is My command: Love one another as I have loved you (HCSB)." To love as He loves you need to know His love for you.

Have you been disappointed by someone else's love?

Do you know how much God loves you?


Take a moment and write out all the ways God shows you His love. Praise Him with a song of your own. Let go of all the disappointments this world brings when it comes to love. Let go and receive the love Christ has for you. In return, let Him be your inspiration and share that love with someone else.

This is my prayer for you –

 ♥ "For this reason I kneel before the Father from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named. I pray that He may grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power in the inner man through His Spirit, and that the Messiah may dwell in your hearts through faith. I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love, and to know the Messiah’s love that surpasses knowledge, so you may be filled with all the fullness of God." ♥

~ Ephesians 3:14-19 (HCSB)

"Jesus, thank you for your unconditional love. I let go of what I think love should be in my life and receive your love for me. The greatest love of all! Your my inspiration and I pray I can love others like you love me."

© Carol Outhous Jones 2014

A Choking Vine – letting go of anger and bitterness

 "All bitterness, anger and wrath, shouting and slander must be removed from you, along with all malice. And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ."

 ~ Ephesians 4:31-32 (HCSB)

 

Bitterness is like a choking vine that can climb around every branch in your life – if you let it. It all begins with hurt, which digs roots of anger in your heart. It creeps into your thought life and suffocates your ability to trust others and even God. Forgiveness? Out of the picture! Being angry is easier and gives you resolve that you are justified not to forgive.

What good does this bring? Anger just robs you of joy. There are so many people in counseling because they have unresolved anger and bitterness. Then they are prescribed medicine to cope with the rage that's in their heart. All this does, is mask the reality of the root issue – the need to let go of anger and bitterness to be able to forgive and restore joy back into their life.

 

Your purpose in life is not to be driven by the sin of anger. Look at Jesus's greatest example of setting aside anger for a forgiving heart. Jesus's death on the cross was the only way to redeem the world's sin, but it was anger in the hearts of the Jewish people that physically but Him there. How ironic! In obedience, Jesus died so spiritually they would have forgiveness, not only for their anger but, for all their sin. Talk about the ultimate act of kindness, compassion, and forgiveness! His sacrificial death and resurrection also forgives all your sin. Every time we give into anger and not forgiveness we take in vain the undeserving death of Jesus Christ.

 

When you are angry, what do you do? Do you take it out on the people who hurt you with revenge? Or maybe you bottle it up so tight that it eventually explodes into shouting and slander. Proverbs 17:27 says, "The intelligent person restrains his words, and one who keeps a cool head is a man of understanding." Have you ever thought about how your anger has brought about bitterness in your life? Is it choking out your kindness and compassion for others? How much longer can you hold on to this before you push everyone away?

 

We are called to be like Christ, therefore; humble yourself before Him and ask for His forgiveness. Ask God for wisdom in how to deal with your anger. He will heal your heart to help you forgive and bring you joy again. Take time this week to read scriptures on anger. Pick a verse that relates and commit it to memory. God will uses His word to soften your heart in order to let go.

 

"My dearly loved brothers, understand this: Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for man’s anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness. Therefore, ridding yourselves of all moral filth and evil, humbly receive the implanted word, which is able to save you."

~ James 1:19-21

 

"God, please forgive me for the anger in my heart. I want to be free of the bitterness it has become. I let go of my anger to you. Please give me a forgiving heart just as Jesus forgives me."

  © Carol Outhous Jones 2014

He Is There – letting go of loneliness

When I'm lonely, I sing. I can remember as a young girl walking home from school singing my way down the curvy, wooded, suburban roads of Berwyn, Pennsylvania. The sound of my voice and the story the song told, would be my companion along the lonely journey home. Now, as I am older I still find myself singing when I'm felling lonely, but my song is from a different place. A calling out to Jesus for His companionship.

Loneliness can walk with you through your day, even when you are surrounded by people. It's a feeling in the heart that separates you from those around you. It almost becomes automatic when associated with certain times of the day. For instance, just after your kids leave for school in the morning or at night when the house is silent, loneliness may set in automatically. Maybe, it's not about a certain time of the day – it's all day and night. Whether single, widowed, or feeling unloved; you are just lonely for companionship. Trapped in this alone feeling is a silent killer of our joy and happiness.

Are you trapped in loneliness?

In a relationship with God there are times when we feel very close to Him and times we don't. I find that the times in my life when I felt more lonely, I was not as close to God. As I grow in my own relationship with Jesus, I have realized that He fills the lonely feeling in my heart. The key is to keep close to Him. Scripture says in James 4:8, "Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." This means you have to seek Him. Sometimes we push God away when we feel lonely. Then we feel abandoned by Him, when all along we were the culprit of our own emptiness. We then try to fill the loneliness with all kind of things that just can't ever get us past the void. The void that only Jesus can fill. What do you fill your loneliness with – food, shopping, boyfriends, television, or books?

Let go of filling your loneliness with meaningless things. God is waiting for you to let him come near and love you. The more you seek God, the more you will fall in love with Him. In return, He is your companion; the one who fills you with a purpose and joy. The loneliness just fades away as you begin to realize He is with you always.

In the morning – He is there!

In the stillness of the night – He is there!

Talk to Him. Open your Bible and read what He has to say to you. Sing to Him with the joy that's in your heart. This week read and meditate on Psalm 139. As you read you will see the depths of His love for you and that He is with you day and night. Let go of the trap of loneliness and be free in the love of Christ.

 Lord , You have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I stand up; You understand my thoughts from far away. You observe my travels and my rest; You are aware of all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, You know all about it, Lord . You have encircled me; You have placed Your hand on me.

~ Psalm 139:1-5 (HCSB)

"Dear Jesus, thank you for being my companion. I let go of my deep feelings of loneliness to you and will let you fill my heart with your love. I sing for joy in the company of your love."

 © Carol Outhous Jones 2014

Your Will Be Done – letting go of my will

 

Morning came despite the night in her heart. All she heard was her heart beating. Everything seemed in slow motion to her. "What is happening?" "My life!" She fell to the floor sobbing with no more words to say. No more words to pray. In the sounds of her cry she heard "Our Father which art in heaven, hollowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done..." "No!," she interrupted. She couldn't believe this was His will. This was not how she dreamed her life would be like. "His will be done?" "Wait!"

Silence over took the morning air. She raised her head to the heavens. In visioning God on a throne with radiant light blinding her eyes and piercing through her heart, she realized her sin of unbelief.  "Father forgive me for not believing your will is best for my life." Her body seemed lighter, as though the Father from heaven, Himself, came down and swooped her up. She stood up and walked over to her bible. She opened it to Matthew 9:20-22,

 

"Just then, a woman who had suffered from bleeding for 12 years approached from behind and touched the tassel on His robe, for she said to herself, “If I can just touch His robe, I’ll be made well!” But Jesus turned and saw her.“Have courage, daughter,” He said. “Your faith has made you well.” And the woman was made well from that moment (HCSB)." 

 

She felt God's arms around her. She was His daughter and He wanted to heal her heart. "But," she thought, "the woman in the bible was healed because of her faith!" Immediately She knew that her lack of belief in the goodness of God's will, proved her faith was weak. "How can He heal me?" She began to read farther down the page to Matthew 9:28-30,

 

"When He entered the house, the blind men approached Him, and Jesus said to them, “Do you believe that I can do this?” “Yes, Lord,” they answered Him. Then He touched their eyes, saying, “Let it be done for you according to your faith!” And their eyes were opened... (HCSB)"

 

She knew then what she needed to do... "Yes, Lord, I believe!" All she needed was a little faith to believe that God could heal her broken heart. That she can trust Him with her life, no matter what may come. His will be done!

 

Have you ever felt your life was going down a different path than you had planned? That Your dreams where being crushed? That all the heartache and pain would never go away?

Do you believe that God's will is best? That He can heal you if you believe?

 

Jesus prayed just before He knew it was almost the time for Him to die on the cross. He prayed three times for God to take this terrible fate from Him. But, God's will was best for His son to die for the whole world, even though it was painful. Take a look at how Jesus prayed to the Father,

 

 "Going a little farther, He fell facedown and prayed, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup pass from Me. Yet not as I will, but as You will.”

Matthew 26:39 (HCSB)

 

"Yet not as I will, but as You will!" Are you able to pray this and really mean it?

This is hard because it means your life is not in your control. You have to be able to let go and give it to the hands of the Creator. The one who holds you in your distress and keeps you safe, but may allow you to go through trials for the glory of God. He is the one who gives you all that you need to face these trials in life? Let Him heal the dark places of your heart. Don't be afraid, have courage daughter of the King and have faith. All it takes is a little faith to believe.

 

 "Yes, Lord, I believe! I let go of my will to you. Your will be done!"



 © Carol Outhous Jones 2014



The Day She Forgot – letting go of those you love

Even though I knew the day would come – the day she would forget who I was. When it actually happened, I realized nothing would have prepared me for it.

There were signs leading up to that day. Mom would talk to me like I was someone other than her daughter; then the next day call me by my name. It didn't matter because I was taking care of her and just enjoyed being with her.

The times I saw her start to fade into that other world she goes to sometimes, I would describe it as almost an imaginary place. With little children needing to be taking care of, tables to be set for the guests who were about to arrive, or the meal that would need to be prepared, and even the lights to be turned on in such a way to set the mood – warm and inviting. That world is her commonplace. Not imaginary to her but a familiar place to which she was always hospitable.

When I would stop and ask her to pray with me, she would pray as though she had no Alzheimer's at all! A special seat in her private conversation with Jesus Christ. Beautiful.

She was still my mom. The woman I've always known, hospitable and godly.

So, the day sitting in the doctors office, I thought I was prepared. The doctor asked her who I was… she called me her sister and didn't know my name. Immediately in my head I started to pray, "God please help me find something funny to say to lighten the heaviness of reality!" The reality that she forgot who I was. Nothing came…

That night I cried my heart out to God. He showed me it was clear I had not fully given my mother up to the Lord. Letting go of the woman who raised me to the Lord was painful; like when letting go of my husband and children. Coming to the realization that the people dear in my life are a part of me but not my possession, brings me to my knees. They are Gods and He has control over them. He knows the plan and His plan no matter how bad it looks to me, is good. He is God who created the heavens and the earth... and my mom. She is His and He loves her unconditionally. Letting go can be painful but oh how peaceful it is to know she is in the care of The Almighty God.

My mother might have forgotten me but, I'm in the care of that same God who cares for my mom. He has not forgotten me. This is the place He wants us to be – on or knees with resolve in our heart that we are weak and believe He is in control. He desires to give His children peace. If only we would always go to the one who is the prince of peace and let it all go at His feet.

He knows you by your name and will never forget you.

"For I know the plans I have for you” — this is the Lord ’s declaration — “plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. You will call to Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart."

~ Jeremiah 29:11-13 (HCSB)

 

"Heavenly Father, thank you having a plan for my life and for knowing my name. I let go of my loved ones to you. They are not mine but yours. I trust you with their lives and give you complete control."

© Carol Outhous Jones 2014